White Liberals, Rejoice! Manhattan Theatre Club Adds Joe Biden Inauguration to Upcoming Season
In The Broadway Beat
“We have to play to our base. Our subscribers are a diverse group covering both the Upper West and East sides, and they LOVE Joe Biden,” defended Artistic Director Sarah Goodes amid criticism by the Broadway community that the move is “predictable,” “boring,” and “leaves no excuse for a turntable”. “At the end of the day, we have to give the people what they want: full, working kitchens on stage, and easily digestible centrism.”
We Tried to Choose a Headline for NBC's "The Grinch Musical!" But Couldn't Land On One So Here's 55
On The Broadway Beat
NBC Grinch Musical Sparks PTSD for All "Seussical" Survivors
NBC's Grinch Deemed Too Uplifting for 2020, Will Instead Air Just Tiny Tim Dying in Act 2 of "A Christmas Carol"
Advice: How to Avoid "The Grinch Musical!" on NBC by Reading a Book and Going to Bed on Time
We Tried to Choose a "Hamilton" Disney Plus Headline But We Couldn't Land On One So Here's 87
Sad! This Composer Can Only Speak in Platitudes
Broadway Still Racist Four Years After Hamilton? Lol Seems Fake But Here’s a Story Anyway
10 More Things Jolene Took From Me
from Points in Case
3. The signature fashion sense I finely crafted over years of trial and error. I would walk down the street and people would tell me, “Oh hey, you look like Jolene,” but really, YOU LOOK LIKE ME.
4. My car, registration, insurance, and weirdly, all of my parking tickets?
No, It’s Not My Period Justin, I’m a Goddamn Werewolf
on Sally Mag
”I am sick and tired of trying to explain that I am a werewolf when my boyfriend thinks I’m just talking about my period.”
Shakespeare Characters I’d Let Do Me And What It Would Be Like
on Little Old Lady Comedy
”Mercutio (from Romeo and Juliet)
An intense, bisexual bae screaming about his white whale (the queen of dreams)…”
Manic, Godless Teens on 15th Modulation of “Tomorrow”
in The Broadway Beat
”LOGANSPORT, Ind - A gruesome scene unfolded in the early afternoon today at Central High School as a roving gang of manic teens hit an unprecedented, downright dangerous fifteenth modulation in “Tomorrow” from Annie, horrified sources confirmed…”
Playwright Accepted into Emerging Writers Group After Removing Sword from Stone Near Public Theater
in The Broadway Beat
”NEW YORK, NY - Local playwright Adolpho Ray Vonto made waves in the theatrical community this week as he removed the cursed sword from the Stone of Cooper Triangle and will now ascend to heights of untold theatrical glory...”
If Shakespeare Characters Had Podcasts
from Weekly Humorist
Queer superstar Puck, The Wyrd Sisters of Scotland, and renowned zombie relationship influencer, Ophelia (+ more!)
Ball Paint: It’s Not Makeup If It’s For Men.
McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, 2019
“FROM THE MAKERS OF 3-IN-1 HAIR AND BODY SCRUBS COMES BALL PAINT, A NEW MAKEUP BRAND THAT SAYS ‘I DIDN’T EVEN TRY TO TRY.’”